My Monday morning office routine was derailed today as I was struck by the images of a grieving nation. I purposefully don’t touch my phone until I have completed certain tasks for this very reason. But today was different. I went on Facebook to make a post for the church and came across a video. Something told me to watch it, so I did.
That video (“Become The Bridge” with Pastors John Gray and Steven Furtick) grabbed my heart and led me to another video which showed the rioting happening in our nation’s capital. When I watched the violent scenes unfold, I was stricken by the expression of pain that, by most, is misunderstood as senseless violence. It is not senseless. It is anger.
I do not condone the actions of those who would destroy rather than channel their anger toward something good. But I do wish to offer an explanation:
This is what unbridled grief looks like.
I understand that many of these people are probably sociopaths exploiting the potential for violence. Michael Caine’s character, Alfred Pennyworth, expressed it best in the 2008 movie “The Dark Knight” - “Some men just want to watch the world burn.” I am not talking about them.
I am talking about those who genuinely desire change in their nation. I am talking about those who cannot walk down their own streets without being profiled. I am talking about those who have seen nothing but prejudice and discrimination from people of other ethnicities. I am talking about those who have experienced the worst this nation has to offer for themselves and their families.
Their plight is real. Their pain is real. Pain does not always allow us to react in a positive manner.
I believe in the right to assemble. I believe in the right to a peaceful protest. Obviously, many of these protests have turned into riots. I do not think this is legal or appropriate, but I do understand why it is happening.
We have a growing societal issue with mourning and grief. Simply put, we do not allow it. I explained this in a recent post (Christians Need To Stop Being So Positive), but let me do a little more exposition. In Romans 12:15, the Apostle Paul commands us to “Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.” We have become terrible at this.
When people express very real negative emotion, we demand that they stop. Our gut reaction is to cheer them up. This is not the way to help a mourning person. They need to be allowed to mourn. They need to be allowed to grieve. And they need people to do so with them.
Let me suggest that we, as a nation, have stifled people’s ability and sacred right to mourn. In doing this, we have created a vacuum for this very necessary expression. What has filled that vacuum? Outrage on one hand and indifference on the other.
We see people rioting, looting, and destroying because they feel it is the only way they will be heard. It is much the same as the suicidal person. Most will never understand why a person would slit their wrists, but I do. It is a physical expression of psychological, emotional, and spiritual pain. It is unhealthy and deadly, but for the person doing it, it is a release.
I never took things so far, but I did contemplate suicide as a teenager. It seemed like a viable solution to stop the pain of this world. It was not until I was offered hope in the person of Jesus Christ that this no longer appealed to me.
In the same way, people are violently protesting because they need an outlet for their grief. They need to weep, but they find no shoulder to cry on. They need to mourn, but they don’t know how. They need to be heard, but they feel like no one is listening.
What is the next logical step? Outrage. Violence. Destruction. The person who does these things believes that it will make them feel better and make others pay attention. They are right about the latter. We are paying attention. The question is, are we listening? Are we hearing their hearts cry out in pain? Or are we dismissing a bunch of thugs as violent brutes who aren’t worth our time and care?
We have a problem in this nation. In fact, we have many. One is racism - allowing our conscience to show respect to persons based on the color of their skin. Another is condemnation - skipping right over proper judgment into declaring a person unworthy or unfit for grace. But the greatest of these is ignorance - excusing ourselves from understanding the pain of another human being and seeing things only from a singular perspective that is not God’s perspective.
In biblical times, people would don sackcloth and ashes as a way to express their inner anguish. Nowadays, people wear black to symbolize their mourning. Yet we seem to have missed the fact that so many protesters wear black. They too, are in mourning. They mourn the deaths of those unjustly killed. They mourn the dream of the late Dr Martin Luther King Jr that has yet to be fulfilled.
There is little we can do to stop what is already happening. But we can help change future outcomes by understanding. We can give hope by offering a listening ear. We can show support by lending a shoulder to cry on.
I encourage you, don’t condemn these people. You don’t have to agree with what they are doing, but it would help if we understood their reasons. As I shared Sunday, human justice is not always black and white. We often see things only from our point of view. Take a step back. Put on someone else’s shoes and walk around awhile. Remove the blinders that keep you from compassionately understanding someone else.
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